I wouldn't buy anything with Velcro. It's a total rip-off!
Why this joke works
Velcro Is Designed to Rip Apart
Hook-and-loop fasteners such as Velcro work through two fabric strips: tiny hooks catch loops, and pulling the strips apart produces a familiar ripping sound. A “rip-off” also means an overpriced or dishonest purchase. Calling Velcro a rip-off therefore describes how it opens while pretending to criticize its value. The first sentence sounds like consumer advice; the second reveals that the complaint is about the product’s normal mechanism.
A closer look
A Product Review Built Around Its Sound
The speaker refuses the purchase before giving a reason, creating the rhythm of a strong consumer complaint. “Total” exaggerates the verdict, while the exclamation point makes the grievance sound final. Listeners familiar with the tearing noise can almost hear the fastener opening. That sensory memory makes the literal reading arrive even without a physical strip as a prop.
Fact behind the joke
Hook-and-Loop Fasteners Work in Microgravity
NASA reports that the International Space Station relies heavily on hook-and-loop fasteners to secure objects that might otherwise float away. Researchers have also studied how long exposure to the station environment affects the material. A fastener designed to be repeatedly pulled apart can still be valuable enough for orbital work—not a fraudulent purchase.